I love to study,
I love the university,
I love the city.
I love to go out,
get out.
I love to meet new people,
see new things,
do new things.
I love the books
I love the chat
and the drinks
and the food
the friends

I love the social life I'm into!
I always had friends and I love them!

But with all that love there always comes a dark side
a side I don't like
a side I hate

I hate to say goodbye again
to my new friends
and I hate to be in the middle of everything
I don't feel home anymore in my old village
I feel home, but it feels different
I would like to start a live in the city I study in
but that's not possible yet
I have to find a place to sleep
and that's just very hard
I hate to be busy with college
not with studying but with traveling
traveling from my home to the university
that's almost a day job
and because of that
I have to quit the things I liked doing
like tennis
like teaching gymnastics
like having fun with friends

less time
less studying
less fun

how come everything gets so complicated
is it me?
do I make things complicated?
more than they already are
is it female-ish?
is it female-like?
hormones?
puberty?

Maybe I just have to get my period...